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Movie Funny Quotes




Jude Law is in so many movies, that I went to one, and when I walked out they were showing another on the back wall.
-- Chris Rock
What do you call 500 lawyers lying on the bottom of the Ocean?
A good start...

-- Danny DeVito (The War of the Roses, 1989)
When a naked man is chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he isn't out collecting for the Red Cross.
-- Clint Eastwood (Dirty Harry, 1971)
Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable.
-- Madeleine Kahn (from the film Clue - 1985 - Jonathan Lynn, John Landis)
I have strong feelings about gun control. If there's a gun around, I want to be controlling it.
-- Clint Eastwood (from Pink Cadillac, 1989 - John Eskow)
Drama is life with the dull bits left out.
-- Alfred Hitchcock
A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.
-- Alfred Hitchcock
A film is never really any good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet.
-- Orson Welles
Our comedies are not to be laughed at.
-- Samuel Goldwyn
Once a month the sky falls on my head, I come to, and I see another movie I want to make.
-- Steven Spielberg
This film cost $31 million. With that kind of money I could have invaded some country.
-- Clint Eastwood
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
-- Alfred Hitchcock
A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
-- Bob Hope


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